Forgiveness

I have decided that it is hard to truly forgive. I have done it. Forgave...and forgotten. Sometimes that has come back to bite me in the ass. You can forgive and move on, sometimes with, and sometimes without, that person. Forgiving and moving beyond that person is probably done mostly for your own sanity. Forgiving and accepting that person back into your life...can make you very vulnerable. Opening yourself up to someone that has proven untrustworthy once, that is not easy. I learn from my mistakes and you won't get a second chance...or would that be a third chance?

There have been a lot of things happening recently that have turned my thoughts to trust and forgiveness. Some even have me questioning my ability to read people...a skill, I confess, that I have not honed well. Some of that is from trusting people to be what they seem. It is a painful truth that people will lie to you on the very bases of who they are.

As far as forgiveness, it is a skill too. A decision based on the best knowledge you possess at the moment. A decision possibly based on your heart more than your head. It is painful to be betrayed by someone that is important in your life...and so much easier to forgive and pretend it did not happen. A misunderstanding. Proximity makes it easier to forgive. I think the more distance, and time, that passes the harder it is to forgive. With time, events are replayed and examined...over and over and in fine detail. With distance, you realize life does indeed go on without that person being a part of it. 

And sometimes, there just isn't enough, "I'm sorry." in the world.