My husband and I were discussing dating, first impressions and attraction today. We've been married 30 + years, so it's been a long time since we dated. First, we had to agree on the definition of attraction. To my husband, when he hears attraction, he thinks of physical appearance. I think of that connection between two people, I guess what some people call chemistry.
He expressed a few things about what he finds attractive that surprised me. Maybe because it's what I want to be...but have, at times, felt like he was fighting me.
He said he didn't need a beauty queen. He wants a woman with backbone. One that was independent and not rely totally on him. One that had a life outside of the marriage. A smart woman.
Thirty years ago he wanted a stay at home mom. He planned to be the sole bread winner. He actually said to me, once upon a time, that no wife of his would work. He expected that I would be relying on him. Our marriage would be insular. Our marriage would be like his parent's.
He made me feel good today.
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