To Whom it May Concern,

I signed papers yesterday allowing you to snoop into my life, "by any means deemed necessary" to prove my worthiness to continue at my job because my company sold me to you. So if you find this little piece of me, I want to say a few things.

I guess, first and foremost, you can't take me at face value. Things are not always what they seem. In my world, if it looks like a duck, walks like a duck and sounds like a duck, it may very well be a firetruck. Sometimes, I don't want people knowing what I am talking about...or looking too closely at my firetruck. No, I am not crazy. I have a vivid imagination...and I'm not afraid to use it.

I am fluent in sarcasm and I use it liberally. To make a point...or not.

I have a sense of humor, whether you understand it or not. I can laugh or I can cry...personally, I prefer to laugh.

I get angry and frustrated sometimes. This is my place to blow off steam. I may use any or all of the above in doing so. What I don't do, is trash talk. You will never see a proper noun to go along with my rants. The proper place for the name of my employer is on my paycheck and my resume...and appropriate professional websites.

And sometimes, I'm boring.

But, I work hard. I am proud of what I do. And I always do my very best. And I am hoping that we will have a mutually satisfying relationship for many years to come...as I have many years until retirement.