Chick-fil-a

I find myself, again, writing on a controversial subject. Not so much because my opinion matters, but to work out some of the conflicting ideas I have in myself.

1. I have no issue with marriage between two people of the same gender. If two people love each other and want to make a spiritual and emotional commitment, why not allow them to make it legal?

2. There have been wars fought to keep our freedoms...one of those basic rights is, freedom of speech.

3. I RESPECT PEOPLE THAT STAND UP FOR WHAT THEY BELIEVE IN. (Cap lock accidentally, but seems important).

Therein lies my mental struggle. I don't have to agree with you, but you still have the right to say it. I am sure there are other business owners that agree with, Chick-fil-a president, Dan Cathy's stand. They are sitting back quietly hoping nobody will notice them, because taking a stand is controversial and potentially bad for business. So they go along to get along. It's the smart businessman thing to do. I will note here also, that several companies have come out in support of gay marriage, most notably Target, Starbucks and Amazon. And just why is it, do you think, that you don't hear about that? These companies are not little Mom and Pop local businesses...and yes there has been a call to boycott Starbucks, but nothing like the furor caused by Chick-fil-a. I have to wonder, as I have before, if media isn't driving us.

I have to stop here a moment for a bit of education. Mr. Cathy has taken a public stand against gay marriage based on the biblical definition of marriage. So what does that mean? I am not an expert, but I can give a brief overview...No sex outside of marriage. No divorce, except for adultery. The wife must submit to the husband in all things. The husband is to protect and provide for his family, putting the family's needs first. This is the basic idea of marriage as outlined in the Bible. So before you step up to support Cathy, take a look at your own home and ask if you meet his standards.

So what conclusions have I drawn? I still believe in two people's right to make a public, and official, declaration of commitment. I still believe in the right to form and express an opinion...hopefully, an educated one. I still believe in the right to stand up for what you believe in. I also believe that you have to face the consequences for your actions. I also detest when the actions of one causes problems for many, especially when the many have little or nothing to do with the actions of one. Many Chick-fil-a's are franchises, owned not by the company, but by individuals...people that had nothing to do with Cathy's stand. These are the local Mom and Pop's trying to put food on the family dinner table. They may or may not agree with the company's stand...how do you know? I'd bet there are even franchises owned by gays...oh what a mess that has to be.

And here again, I had to stop, time for a little self education. See, I believe in making decisions based on knowledge, at least as best as I can understand the information that I can find. And what I found after doing a little digging...Chick-fil-a exceeds $2 billion in annual sales and a whopping 50% of net profits from the franchise goes back to the corporation. So, yes, taking a stand and boycotting Chick-fil-a may indeed send a message. But what is that message? Take a stand for what you believe in. But that is exactly what he did. And sometimes you just have to agree to disagree. No minds will be changed over a chicken sandwich and waffle fries. But if you are going to take a stand against Chick-fil-a because he was bold enough to exercise his right to freedom of speech and spoke his beliefs, then know where other companies stand and support those that agree with you. Skip Chick-fil-a and head over to Starbucks.

And in the end, it all comes down to this, for every $1 spent at Chick-fil-a, 50 cents goes to the owner of the store and 50 cents goes to the corporation...and some portion of that is going to support an anti-gay group.

All of that just to decide where to get my chicken sandwich.

Colorado

I've taken a few days to let all of this percolate through my brain...the shooting at the Colorado theater. People are killed by violence everyday, even sometimes in multiples. It makes the news, it passes through our thoughts and we move on. So why do incidents like this shooting at the premiere of Dark Knight Rises resonate with the public consciousness? Why are we still considering it days later? Besides, of course, the never ending news coverage. I don't think it's the senselessness or the violence. Or the why? I think it's the vulnerability. You are not safe. Anywhere. 

I have read a lot about the story on news media and social networks. Reading people's thoughts and reactions. It always amazes me that people will express an opinion, when it is obvious from their statements, that they have no clue as to what happened. Are they not paying attention, or just jumping to a conclusion...or do they just twist the events to meet their needs to be judgmental? 

I have seen many comments made about the people that dressed in costume for the movie. Most of them negative. Not that the people in costume had anything to do with the shooting. I've seen it reported that the owner's of the theater are going to ban costumes. My first thought was, define costume. If I want to wear all black to a vampire movie, is that a costume? Or are they going to ask me to open my mouth so they can check for fangs? Because my fangs are so dangerous. What about a purple wig to Hunger Games? I can, sort of, understand the concern about masks...but from what I have read, none of this had anything to do with the shooting. 

I have read many comments from people, that at least claim, to have a concealed carry permit. They grouse that they can't carry their guns into the theater. They state they since they have a carry permit they should be allowed to protect themselves and be allowed to carry their weapon wherever they go. I don't have a carry permit and I'm not sure how I feel about returning to the days of the wild west when everyone was armed. I have cheered the common man that has protected himself against those that meant him harm. But in a dark, crowded theater, where people are panicked and running, I think more people shooting, would have led to more people dead or wounded...plus in this case, the shooter was probably better armored than SWAT. 

I saw a news agency ask the question if this would change people's habit of going to theaters. Some people answered, yes. I don't understand. That's like saying your going to quit driving because someone was in a car accident. I refuse to let the violence change my life, I feel like that is letting them win. I fly. I go to work and the mall. But I am more aware of people around me, especially when they are being verbally threatening. I see this at work, and think to myself, "Will this be the one that comes back and shoots the place up?" But then, I go on. On another note, I wonder if the news media is making news when they ask a question like that, stirring up fear. Or are they just expressing the fear that is already there?

I saw on Facebook a suggestion that Christian Bale, dressed at Batman, should visit the children that were injured, to show them there were heroes too. Personally, I would think after this experience that seeing Batman walk in, might be a little traumatic. Besides, it isn't Batman that comes to the rescue in real life. The heroes are the people that covered others with their bodies, the people that carried others out and the police officers and others that ran into that theater...real people.

My condolences to the families, friends and loved ones of those involved. I even include the family of the shooter. It was not their fault, but their lives will never be the same either...and they are unlikely to get the community support. 

Play

I have never outgrown my desire to put on make-up and do my hair. I have never outgrown the desire to put on clothing that makes me feel special. I have never outgrown the fun of doing these things, while giggling with friends. I have never outgrown playing make believe. I have never out grown fun. I feel sorry for those, whose lives have become so serious, that they have forgotten how to play.

RIP Jimmy

I found out today that the guy I consider my first boyfriend, died of a massive stroke a few months ago. We were a couple for a few months...I think I was in the 7th grade, he was a sophmore. Big stuff. We obviously didn't make it as a couple, but we stayed friends for the next few years. Him acting as my big brother, along with a few others, and making it difficult to have a "love life". The kind of thing you can do when the people are young and the relationship simple. He graduated and I didn't see him so much. But he always had a big smile and a hug for me. I think the last time I'd seen him was...wow, maybe 10 years ago. We didn't really know each other anymore, just memories of people and times long gone. But he still had a smile, still happy to see me. 

He was 52.

Tap, tap, tapping

I'm sitting here trying to relax. Tomorrow is a holiday, so no work. So I got comfy, cracked open a book on the Nook and kicked back. Unfortunately, I can't get my brain to focus exclusively on the book. The job change keeps knocking on my mental door. It shadows over everything. So much to consider. So little information. I can't change it, but I can't shake the worry...especially since everyone in the office frets about it daily. I really like my job, so I don't want to find something new. All I wanted was some stability. The unknown is the worse part....always is.

I had stopped writing but it seemed somehow unfinished. More tap, tap tapping at my mental door. One side of my brain trying to freak out. The other, rational side, saying, nothing to do. I am usually good at compartmentalizing but every now and then the obsessive gene clicks in. I want to do something. I want, need, some control. I have searched and searched the internet and every crook and nick that I can think of for information. I keep trying to be the one just sitting back and...it isn't working too well. 

Tap, tap, tap.