Family skeletons

My mother's family has been quite the mystery to me. Her mother died when she was 3, so she didn't seem to know much about them either...or elected not to share. That's the type of person she was. A few things have popped up over the years that piqued my curiosity. I discovered this weekend, that with the help of a few websites, I could put pieces of this puzzle together. When I ran out of pieces, that way, I reached out to one of the few family members I maintain contact with. I shared what I knew, she filled in some blanks.

As I don't want to out other people's skeletons, well anymore than I already have, inadvertently, I will only identify people by their relationship to me and initials. Here goes...

I discovered my grandfather (AA) was born May 11, 1916 and died May 19, 1973. He worked at a saw mill and his highest education was listed as 5th grade. Times were different back then. My grandmother (LG) made it through the 8th grade. Born March 18, 1920, she died at the age of 24, December 7, 1944. "Female problems" was the only explanation for her death that I ever heard. Kind of broad.

LG was AA's first wife, according to birth records, they had 4 children, 2 girls and a set of twin boys. One of those girls, NDA, was my mom. The other girl, MJA, is where one of the mysteries cropped up. Back when my mom was dying, MJA was tested to be a donor, but the test came back that they were not full siblings. A medical error? This weekend research, says no. MJA confirms that she was told by a paternal aunt, that her mother was pregnant with her before she met the man listed on her birth certificate. MJA said she never had any desire to pursue the matter. I wonder if she had never believed it, until that lab test came back?

After LG's death, AA married MLB. She had a son prior to their marriage, and they had 6 children together. One of those children died, so the family legend is, when MLB fell asleep while feeding the baby and rolled over and suffocated the child. That child, named Peggy, died July 1, 1949. They eventually had another daughter, they named Peggy. I'm sorry, that's just weird.

I have, so far, solved a couple of the mysteries I started with. I have accounted for all the siblings and their parentage. I discovered after the death of LG, her children went to live with relatives. My set of twin uncles were adopted at the age of 16, when, as I was told, "some shady shit went down."

I know my mom spent some time at Maryhurst. It is now a school for troubled girls. I don't know if it was the same back then. There are still a few unanswered questions, and a few untouched sources of information, so I may be adding later on.

My relative and I have started a dialogue. We have more in common than either of us imagined. Those kind of things that people on the outside, looking in, never know about. Funny, how someone can wear one face in public and be a completely different person behind closed doors. Everyone always told me how lucky I was. How sweet my mom was. And she was, to everyone else...to their faces. Behind closed doors, she was hateful. I sometimes wonder if that is why I never developed a relationship with her family...all I ever heard was nasty stuff about them. Behind those closed door, I was never safe. She let me know exactly what she thought of me. She was physically, emotionally and verbally abusive. Makes me wonder why I started on this quest to unravel her family tree. Maybe, I thought, I'd find some explanation for the person she turned out to be. I have no doubt she had a hard life, in those early years. But it still doesn't fly. I think I'll close this chapter, maybe unfinished, but this particular history holds nothing for me.