Dear Sandman,

Can we negotiate? I don't know what else I can offer. I invite you over. I try to be a good hostess.

Warm baths, sleepy tea, mediation, reading...downright drugs (prescribed). And, yet, I go to bed and am left struggling to just keep my eyes closed or I drop like a stone in a well, for a nap. It is so hard to be awake for a couple of hours, right smack in the middle of the night. Funny thing, I haven't felt any ill effect, yet. Of course, that will change if you continue to be a greedy bastard. What's a little sleep to you? Sorry, I shouldn't be nasty. More carrot, less stick. Come on over. Stick around a bit. How do you feel about handcuffs?