Belief

I long ago decided that I did not believe in religion. Religion not being the same as God. Religion is man-made, and therefore fallible. Religion is often twisted and turned to suit the agenda of a group or individual...if it were not so, wouldn't there only be ONE religion for each deity?

There was a time that I had a very strong faith. I felt His presence in my life. I even went in search of a religion that would give me a stronger foundation in my beliefs. I very much admire people that make choices about their beliefs...and life. I was unsuccessful. I could find more things I disagreed with, than what felt right.

I have for some time now identified myself as agnostic...as I tend not to be a never/always kind of person. I can't say that there is no God, but He is not a part of my life. I envy people that find such joy, but I  find no comfort there. I have come to a point in my life now, where I ask myself serious questions. Questions many people, it seems, would never dare contemplate...especially out loud. Why? Fear. Fear of retribution from a wrathful God. Fear of condemnation by family and friends...or religious zealots. There are few people more dangerous than those that claim a close personal relationship with their God. I do not want to embrace something out of fear. I would rather embrace a loving God. One that realizes that I am human and imperfect and would forgive me my questions and doubts as long as I have tried to live a good life. Personally, questioning is a sign of intelligence. I would think MY God would appreciate that in his children.