Vision

I have always had the fear of losing my vision. I am severely near-sighted, four inches beyond my nose is about my limit. When I was a kid the eye doctor used to threaten that I would need a seeing eye dog if I didn't wear my glasses...guess we know where the fear originated. Over the years I have had issues with my eyes; flashes, floaters, etc. I have been told that my eyes are unusually oblong, causing thinning of their surface...wanna talk about an idea that will scare the crap out of you. I have had posterior vitrial detachment. I have been warned about retinal detachment. So I feel completely vindicated in my worry. 


Now, I am losing my vision. Not from any of the things I have been warned or worried about, but from cataracts. A cataract is a clouding of the lens. This is something most people deal with much later in life, usually in their 60's. I am a little ahead of my time. Cataracts normally develop over a long period of time, mine have appeared and compromised my vision in less than 2 years. My ability to see is declining on a measurable basis...in weeks.


In hindsight, I see all the measures I have taken to counteract the deterioration of my vision, the loss of detail and the increased glare caused by the foggy film inside my eye. All of my web pages that offer design options are dark...less glare. I bought a new living room lamp, put in brighter bulbs and ultimately bought a book light to get enough light to see the print. I've even found myself adjusting the brightness setting down. It's a fine line between needing more light to see and fighting glare.


Fortunately, this is all correctable. I can have surgery. I will have surgery...sometime in the next few months, first the left eye, then the right. I won't even begin to explain what a mess that is going to be with surgery, work, recovery, vision adjustments, glasses, medications, eye shields...driving. I get anxious just considering it all. I expect a course of 3-6 months before it is all said and done...assuming I don't get a secondary cataract, infection or any other unforeseen incident as they say in medical jargon. 


It is a small thing in the world of big and scary things. I work in the medical field, I know all about big and scary. But this is my scary thing, this is what sets heavily on my mind.